Responding to America's current love affair with trying to incarcerate as much of the population as possible, Las Vegas has begun an initiative of combining High School detentions with serving time in the local jail. "It'll be good training for the kids who drop out to learn how to handle themselves in lockup," offered Superintendent of Schools Werner Kemp. "It'll also prepare a fair number of the graduates as well, when they find out with all the jobs shipped overseas the greatest benefit they can become to society is to take a career the penal industry. It is America's growth industry of the future." Local Sheriff Maybelle Osborne adds, "It allows me to get an early look at the kids. Heck, we're gonna get most of them someday. Why wait?" We interviewed Adam Crumb, serving thirty days for not having a hall pass, about the program. "Don't I get a lawyer or a trial or something?" Sheriff Osborne replied, "There are no civil right protections for High School detention. So suck it up and do your time, kid."
Have a fun April Fool's Day.
Have a fun April Fool's Day.